Weird local crimes

Weird local crimes are strange things that have been outlawed in various locales around the country or around the world.

There are many laws that don't make much sense, or sound unusual to us. Most of these are so absurd that nobody thinks to enforce them anymore. Still, you have to wonder, if they bothered to make them in the first place, that must mean that somebody's had to have tried them, right?

• Charging for a piano performance by somebody with only one arm: Illegal in Iowa. Somebody in Iowa must have gotten bitter about going to some one-handed guy's piano recital once.
• Poking an elephant and calling it Miley Cyrus: Illegal in New Jersey. Unlike most of the other crimes in this list, this law is still enforced.

We still don't know if this law is actually constitutional or not, because the question of whether calling an elephant Miley Cyrus is speech or not has never come before the Supreme Court.

• Changing a light bulb if you're not a licensed electrician: Used to be illegal in Victoria, Australia. They finally came around and realized that changing a light bulb isn't that dangerous.
• Farting in public after 6 PM on Thursdays: Illegal in Florida. Maybe it makes Thor mad and he doesn't wake up until 6 PM.
• Doorknob licking: Illegal on other planets.
• Walking your dog less than three times a day: Illegal in Turin.

The city must secretly be run by dogs or something.

• Refusing the use of your toilet to any random stranger off the street: Illegal in Scotland.

Civil law. Not even once.

• Having a beer in the same room as a bingo game: Illegal in North Carolina. The universe is actually a simulation and the devs never patched an exploit that involves taking a beer to a bingo game in North Carolina.
• Holding a salmon under suspicious circumstances: Illegal in England.

This one actually makes sense if you think about it, because it probably means you know the salmon was illegally fished. We just like making fun of the funny way British people phrase things.

• Owning one guinea pig: Illegal in Switzerland. Zero is fine, and two is fine, but one is right out. The logic behind this law is that guinea pigs are social animals.