Emily Ratajkowski

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Don't be deceived by that cute face. Emily Ratajkowski is pure evil.

Emily Ratajkowski is a woman with two superpowers. However, she's not a superhero.

Early life[edit | edit source]

As a child, Emily was bullied for her last name, until she realized that that name was a superpower itself.

Things would usually go down like this:

Boy 1: "Did you hear how Emily got her name?"

Boy 2: "No, how?"

Boy 1: "When she was born, her parents dropped a spoon in the garbage disposal and turned it on and named her after the sound it made."

Emily Ratajkowski: "Nice story. Let's hear you actually say my name."

Boy 1: "That's easy. Emily Rataj--"

He was unable to finish, as he had begun coughing up blood. He died shortly after.

As you can see, a minimal knowledge of male psychology also helps.

Career[edit | edit source]

When Emily got older, she realized that her body was also a superpower. It made men do dumb things, like obsessively take pictures of it.

Instead of using this power for good, she used it to get money from them.